Tag Archives: self care

Self-Care on a Student Budget

When I hear the term self-care I automatically envision myself relaxing at a luxurious spa with cucumbers over my eyes, laying in a mud bath from a natural hot spring. Unfortunately, I have never actually been to a spa, although I definitely plan to treat myself to a fancy spa day when I am no longer a broke college student! Nonetheless, self-care to me has almost always involved spending money whether that be $5 towards a bubble tea, or a bit more on a new shirt or iPhone accessory. The same rings true for many of my friends, particularly my best friend, Sara, who takes multiple trips to the mall every week in the name of self-care and in the spirit of “Treat yourself.”

And you absolutely should treat yourself, right?

You, hardworking YOU, deserves that brand-new item you’ve been eyeing or those concert tickets you’ve been contemplating for weeks. However, it is important for us to understand that engaging in self-care does not require you to spend this week’s pay check. In fact, self-care does not require you to spend any money at all.

Yesterday, for APA’s Active Week 2019, employees were given the opportunity to go to the U.S. Botanic Garden for about an hour and a half in the morning. Eight of us set off at 9:45 am on a mile-long walk to the garden and were back a little bit after 11:00 am. This was my very first time at the Botanic Garden and it did not disappoint (except for the fact that the Butterfly Garden included no actual butterflies but that is a conversation for another time). I have always loved flowers ever since I was a child and the Botanic Garden offered an impressive array of flowers and plants found all over the World. The excursion gave each of us a chance to get away from our desks for a bit during the work day, and the views on the walk there as well as at the actual garden itself were a huge bonus. It was a great experience and I plan to go back and visit soon.

Orange Marmalade Firecracker Flowers at the entrance of the U.S. Botanic Garden

The excursion to the Garden was something I didn’t know I needed but I came back feeling refreshed and content. I was ready to get back to work after the short break and I didn’t realize until after that I was practicing self-care. The term itself is defined as any activity that we do deliberately in order to take care of our mental, emotional, and physical health. Self-care seems easy enough, but it is often forgotten and overlooked, especially when life gets busy. There are numerous benefits of self-care including better physical and emotional health, improved mood, and reduced stress and anxiety, to name a few. Self-care also combats burnout which can occur when you exert all your energy towards taking care of others, while neglecting yourself in the process. So, in conclusion, engaging in self-care is extremely important to live your best, most meaningful life. Although you may not necessarily be able to take a walk to the Botanic Garden, do something that makes you happy, whether that be taking a quick a walk, getting an extra hour of sleep at night, spending some time with a friend, or a taking hot bath before bed. Make sure to check in on yourself, find time to unplug, and take the time today that will have a positive impact on you going forward. Treat yourself!

Sources referenced:

Not sure where to start on your self-care journey? Here are some helpful links:

Sydney Wade is a rising college senior attending school in Austin, TX. She is originally from Maryland and spent this summer working as an intern for APA’s Early Career & Graduate Student Affairs.

Dear Me, Future Psychologist. Yours truly, Dr. Erlanger Turner

APAGS is thankful for all of the psychologists that participated in the Dear Me series for the gradPSYCH Blog. Considering the success of these posts, APAGS is expanding the series to include early career psychologists that have been doing amazing things since graduation.

We’ve asked early career psychologists to write a letter to their 16-year-old self. We hope you enjoy these letters and glean some wisdom and guidance as you decide whether to enter graduate school in psychology, as you navigate the challenges of graduate school, and as you make decisions about your career and life.

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Dr. Erlanger “Earl” Turner is a licensed psychologist and assistant professor of psychology at the University of Houston-Downtown. He is also the Director of the Race and Cultural Experiences Research (R.A.C.E.) Lab, and often serves as a media psychologist. Dr. Turner writes a blog, The Race to Good Health, and has been quoted by numerous media sources on mental health, race relations, and cultural competency. Dr. Turner’s current research examines (1) correlates of ethnic minority health, (2) identifying mechanisms of help-seeking, and (3) developing interventions to improve utilization and adherence to psychological treatments. While in graduate school, he served as the APAGS Member-at-Large (Practice Focus) and was the first former APAGS member to be elected to an APA standing board. He was the 2017 Chair of the APA Board for the Advancement of Psychology in the Public Interest and is the first early career psychologist to serve as chair of BAPPI. Recently, he was elected as the first African American male to be president of the Society for Child and Family Policy and Practice (APA Division 37).

. For more information, please visit Dr. Turner’s website.

DEAR-ME

FROM THE DESK OF Erlanger Turner:

Dear Earl,

You have always been an introverted person with a comedic personality that only those close to you (e.g., family and friends) truly have an opportunity to witness. Who is to say that you have to share with the entire world the person God made you to be?

In life, you will face great challenges and maybe not experience much success. However, self-doubt will not push you towards achieving any goal in life. I know that one of your biggest fears is failure. Let that be the driving force in your life to keep running over any obstacle that you may face either personally or in your career. Growing up in Louisiana should not be your final destination nor your highest aspiration. Seek guidance from those who motivate you and always keep your mind on the powers that be to lead you to accomplish “your goals”.

As a first generation college student, you will have the chance to set the mark for your siblings and other family members to step out on faith. Don’t allow your internal conflicts and doubts determine how you live or what career you will pursue. Remember that it is great to help others, but always remember to do what is best for yourself. Pursuing a career in medicine will not be an easy task and you will face challenges as a Black man from the outside world.

As you move forward in life and work towards being the 1^st in your family to graduate from high school, keep these things in mind:

You control your destiny and what you accomplish in life. Don’t hold yourself to others expectations and stay focused on what makes you happy. In the midst of difficult challenges do not doubt the decisions you make. Those decisions will be the lessons you learn and will help others to recognize how experiences shape who you are as a person.

Being Black is beautiful! Don’t get caught up in the stereotypes that exist in society. You should love all the aspects of who you are. Each person is uniquely created and you should value your individuality as a person that is embedded within a community that is often perceived as not good enough.
You can be great at whatever you do in life. Remember that greatness is not defined by the lack of struggles but how you overcome those obstacles that you face. Set a goal and keep working towards it until you are satisfied.

In closing, “setting a goal is only your starting point. It’s the hard work that determines your final destination”.

–Erlanger A. Turner, Ph.D.

Editor’s Note: Dear Me, Future Psychologist is inspired by the Dear Me book series by Joseph Galliano. Special thanks to David A. Meyerson, Ph.D. for creating this series for the gradPSYCH Blog. Please check out other letters in this series:

What is Imposter Syndrome?

Have you ever felt like an imposter? Do you often look at your colleagues and feel like they are smarter, faster, or just generally better than you? Do you feel incompetent? Do you feel that you landed in your current position by luck rather than by skill or hard work? There is a term for that feeling: Imposter Syndrome.

Imposter syndrome is a term coined by psychologists at Georgia State University, Pauline Clance, PhD and Suzanne Imes, PhD in 1978. Imposter syndrome (also known as imposter phenomenon, fraud syndrome, or imposter experience) refers to the anxious feeling that one has gained success and fame only by luck and coincidence, having deceived others. People with imposter syndrome consider their successes as resulting from external factors and thus think of themselves as imposters. That is, they do not acknowledge that success was made by their effort and performance, but rather by luck, timing or coincidence.

Imposter syndrome is not limited to graduate students! In fact, Hollywood actors, Jodie Foster, Natalie Portman, Emma Watson, and the COO of Facebook, Sheryl Sandberg, have all stated that they have suffered from imposter syndrome. At some point, they all believed that their wealth and fame were gained only by luck, that people were overestimating their talent and would soon discover their incompetence.

What are the causes of imposter syndrome?

There are many factors that contribute to imposter syndrome. After an initial success, sometimes people’s perceived expectations become higher, adding additional stress and anxiety around the potential of disappointing others. Other causes include how one was raised, emotional traits (insecurity, perfectionism, etc.), and psychological problems.

The high suicide rate of Ivy League students may also be attributed to imposter syndrome. Many of these students graduated high school at the top of their class, and are now surrounded by equally smart and talented individuals. Comparatively, these students are now average in a much larger pool of students, no longer the top students in the class. As they compare themselves to other students, their self-esteem may drop considerably and they may fear no longer being able to meet others’ high expectations. This fear of being exposed along with lowered self-esteem can lead to severe depression which can be linked to suicide attempts.

People with Imposter syndrome tend to continuously question their ability and try to become perfect, potentially even discounting the fact that they have already made great achievements. Fearing failure, they may use the imposter syndrome as a defense mechanism. Believing that they are incompetent from the beginning, in order to avoid the psychological trauma caused by failure. However, such reactions can cause anxiety, low self-esteem, and negative self-concept, which in turn tends to lower their actual rate of success.

How can we keep from falling into the trap of imposter syndrome?

1. Avoid perfectionism.
Perfectionists can be so strict on themselves that they may miss smaller achievements and successes. A perfectionist tends to set extremely high (maybe even unattainable) goals, and then experience shame or defeat when they do not meet these goals. This behavior can be self destructive. Remember, the final outcome of a situation is not the only thing that defines you. Make an effort to look at a situation in totality to be able to glean other positive outcomes. For example, if you worked on a group project that did not earn the highest praise from your professor, think about positive outcomes that you did achieve– learning to work well with a diverse group; effectively managing your time; or perhaps learning new material that you may be able to apply in other settings. Finding ways to recognize accomplishments big and small can go a long way to alleviating feeling like an imposter.

2. Put less stock in what others may think of you.
The most important opinion of you is YOURS! Others may have expectations of you that are unrealistic or may be reflective of their own insecurities. While a healthy dose of “caring what others think” is useful, putting too much stock in someone else’s opinion of you may be harmful to your own self-esteem.

3. Acknowledge and celebrate yourself.
You should acknowledge that your success is the result of your effort and action, and not by luck or good fortune. In other words, one’s success is made possible by oneself. Unsure of what you have accomplished? Try making a list. Include all achievements, big and small. Add to the list throughout your graduate school career. You will be amazed by how many things you have been able to accomplish. That feeling of accomplishment will help relieve self doubt or other insecurities that may arise. When you are confident about something that you did well, that positive energy can lead to future successes.

4. Ask for help.
Do not feel ashamed to ask for help. Asking for help does not show incompetence, but rather exhibits a desire for successful outcomes. Ask freely, as there may be other people who also do not know what you don’t know, and try to find solutions together.

5. Develop resilience.
Do not be frustrated if you fail. As we have learned how to ride bicycle after several failed attempts, we finally succeed and from that point forward, we know how to ride successfully! So try not to dwell on small failures or mistakes.

6. Secure individual private time.
If you compare the success of others to your own progress, or feel the need to meet the expectation of others, you may experience discomfort or uncertainty, which can lower self-esteem. In that case, it is important to find space to be able to consider and understand the source of our insecurities and organize our thoughts to recharge and focus on our positive achievements.

We all have vulnerabilities and the desire to be acknowledged. However, perfection does not exist in this world. So let’s reframe our thinking and change our lives to enjoy and celebrate our value!

Get more information on imposter syndrome:

Hanna Park received her Bachelor’s degree in Psychology at Columbia University and Master’s degree in Cognitive Studies in Education at Teachers College, Columbia University. She worked as a journalist for the Korean Psychological Association.

The Graduate Student Guide to Getting Your S**t Together

MPj04440980000[1] This is it: the time when it seems like every professor, every research conference, every supervisor has come together to plot how to make these last few weeks a mad fury of papers, projects, sweat, and tears for us graduate students.

In the midst of this chaos, it is all too easy to let certain things – the less pressing papers, the cleanliness of our apartments, our mental well-being- slip by the wayside. In an effort to alleviate some of that relentless pressure, I present tips for the graduate student to keep their s**t together.

Make a to-do list and put everything on there. The most empowering to-do lists are those which are a combination of tasks you hope to get done (write that report, make that call) and those you will get done anyway unless some catastrophic event occurs (i.e., see that patient, go to that class). With a to-do list like this, you check off more things and get a better picture of how amazingly productive you are, and that can be all the fuel you need to get more of the things done.
Break down your bigger tasks. Rome wasn’t built in a day and neither is a dissertation – when planning out your tasks don’t simply write in ‘dissertation’ but small, tangible goals that can be accomplished in 1-2 hour blocks (e.g., ‘write intro paragraph’; ‘find depression measure’; ‘draft Table 1’).
Five minutes can be a damn good start to some things. We all know what the hardest part of a task is…. Getting started. Whether it is the first draft of an abstract, writing a few emails, or starting the blog post you keep meaning to do, using small bouts of time productively can really add up.

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If Helplessness is Learned, Success Can Also be Learned

What is learned helplessness?

Sometimes, we set low expectations or do not try to seize new opportunities because we do not want to be faced with disappointment. While there may be reasons for such behavior, it can really limit the scope of experiences we allow ourselves to have.

When people experience failure repeatedly, they often tend to give up without trying, even if they have the ability to succeed. This is called “learned helplessness.” Learned helplessness is a phenomenon coined by Martin Seligman and Steven Maier while studying avoidance learning and formation of fear conditioning.

In 1967, at the University of Pennsylvania, Seligman and Maier separated 24 dogs into three groups. The dogs were put into harnesses and received electric shocks. In group 1 (escape group), dogs could end the electric shocks by pressing a lever with their noses. In group 2 (no-escape group/experiment group):, they did not have a lever and could not avoid the electric shocks. In group 3 (no harness control group), dogs did not receive any electric shock.

After spending 24 hours in harnesses, the dogs were placed in a different box in which they could avoid the electrical shocks by jumping over a low barrier to the other side. Here’s what happened: Dogs in group 1 and 3 avoided electric shocks by jumping over the barrier, but dogs in group 2 — the group that had no choice to avoid the shocks — crouched in the corner and received all shock. That is, the dogs in group 2 exhibited learned helplessness. Seligman found that after repeated failures of avoiding electric shocks, the dogs in group 2 learned that their behavior didn’t impact the electric shocks and the shocks were uncontrollable. Thus, the dogs gave up trying to avoid the electric shocks altogether.

Learned helplessness can be easily observed in our everyday lives. For example, if one studies hard for math exams but consistently does not earn good grades, that person may stop investing time in studying math. Or, if a person is unable to find a job even after applying and interviewing many times, they can eventually give up and discontinue their job search. Learned helplessness can be seen in politics as well. People are able to cast votes in elections but if they feel that there is no change, some will give up and stop voting. The thought, “Even if I vote, nothing changes,” becomes inscribed in their minds.

When we cannot control our external environment, we can fall into helplessness and stop trying to improve our situation.

What are the signs of learned helplessness?

Learned helplessness has three core characteristics:

When a person faces failure of learning, he or she shows the tendency to give up.
A person avoids one’s responsibility as the cause of failure.
When one’s responsibility is recognized, there is tendency to attribute the cause of failure to one’s lack of ability rather than lack of effort.

If one attributes the cause of negative events to one’s fault (internal attribution), one considers oneself more negatively than in the case of attributing the cause to environment or other people (external attribution).

The experience of repeated failure causes emotional, motivational, and cognitive harm. The resulting combination of signs include lack of confidence, depression or negative perception, lack of control, lack of persistence, and lack of responsibility. If such signs are neglected without proper treatment for an extended period of time, they could turn into disorders that threaten one’s social psychological well-being.

How can we overcome learned helplessness?

To overcome learned helplessness, we should increase the number of successful experiences by setting achievable goals. For example, if the goal is to learn a foreign language, set an attainable goal such as memorizing 10 vocabulary words in that language. Once this goal has been achieved, it will create a positive memory of success. These continued positive experiences will gradually build confidence. Later, you can set goals with a higher level of difficulty and gradually push away negative memories of failure. These small achievements can help reduce the effects of learned helplessness.

Another technique to overcome learned helplessness is to grow “failure resistance.” That is, the ability to overcome failure and maintain a positive outlook. To effectively grow failure resistance and escape from situations of helplessness, people can encourage themselves to think positively and reframe negative thoughts. For example, think about a failure as an obstacle to overcome in order to reach an ultimate success. This reframe helps to put negative experiences into perspective and will keep you from spiraling into helplessness.

If we do not give up, even in moments of pain and despair, a whole new world can open up for us. For example, persistence can help us land a new job that can lead to new, interesting paths — or lead us to friendships with people who initially did not seem to fit in our lives. These are completely unexpected experiences. But if we do not try, the opportunity for a variety of experiences will be drastically reduced.

If helplessness has been learned, success can also be learned.

Hanna Park received her Bachelor’s degree in Psychology at Columbia University and Master’s degree in Cognitive Studies in Education at Teachers College, Columbia University. She currently works as a journalist for the Korean Psychological Association.